First Teaching and Landmark Days!

I knew I had to blog today and mark this day! Today I taught a portion of the Teen Yoga class at Divine Yoga for the first time! Jenn and I are co-teaching the series - last week I did assisting and massage. Tonight I started off class, introduced the theme, got through Integration, then Sun As and Bs before handing off to Jenn. I feel pretty amazing! This was a less intimidating way to start teaching - and I felt so supported and prepared well. The theme we decided on for this class was judgment. I started them on their backs and did some breathing with them. I started talking about judgment and when we have been judged by others and how it feels. Then I related that to self-judgment and how that shows up - being nervous, anxious, hesitant to do things. I talked about the space on their yoga mat being their home. Then I gave them a visualization technique of putting the thoughts that come up into a bubble and picture it floating away. Then we got started! I had a lot of fun, was only a tiny bit nervous and I think it flowed well. :)

Yesterday I also applied for Baptiste Level 1 Training in Sedona in June! Yep, up to BIG things! :)

I looked back out of curiosity on my blog.

Almost 1 year ago I broke my finger falling out of headstand in the middle of the room at yoga. I was reading 40 Days to a Personal Revolution for the first time, working on headstand and anticipating going to Foundations in Action in Toronto in February. I didn't know quite yet that I'd be applying for and accepting a full time job the next month either.

Exactly 2 years ago today I blogged about it being my first day employed by someone else after having owned my business for over 7 years. I had taken a part time job and  was just at the point of being ready to look forward in my life.

3 years ago I was barely beginning my weight loss journey, over 130lbs heavier than I am today, suddenly at a loss for direction and purpose in life.

What amazing perspective this gives you. Who knows what the year will bring? I'm excited to find out!

Downdawg Detroit

It could not have been a more perfect evening! Sunny skies, light breeze and 200+ Detroit area yogis practicing on the roof of the Madison Theatre Building. A bird's eye view of Ford Field, Comerica Park, the Fox Theatre and other Detroit landmarks. Vinyasa-ing to Eminem's Lose Yourself blasting from the speakers. Savasana with a view of the beautiful sky and a building kissed by sunset. Amazing!

The event was sponsored by Lululemon and led by Jonny Kest of Center for Yoga as a fundraiser for the Danialle Karmonos Work It Out nonprofit that brings yoga to Detroit schools to improve the health and wellness of kids in the city. How great to have an event bringing together yogis from studios across the Metro area, uniting as a greater community. You could feel the energy and hope for the city.

Thad and I went with Stephanie, Deb and Cheryl from Divine Yoga. What a fun evening!

Stephanie and I waiting in line (Deb and Thad in the reflection)

Stephanie, Deb, Cheryl, Thad, me on the roof!

Mat to Mat yogis in the D!

Thad & I

Thad

The most awesome Savasana, I had to open my eyes!

Fruit Fast - Day 3

7am: Breakfast - smoothie with grapefruit, mango, a little coconut milk, 1 banana
10:30am Snack - 1 banana
12:00pm Lunch - same as yesterday! Strawberry Avocado Salad
3:00pm Snack - 1 cara cara orange
5:15pm Snack - smoothie with green apple, mango, a little coconut milk
7:45pm Snack - 2 clementines
9:00pm Dinner - Tomato and Watermelon Salad

Sounds like a strange combination, doesn't it? I actually went searching to find a recipe with Avocado and Watermelon, as it just sounded like those two might be able to go together. Well, I even found one with Tomatoes and Cucumber in it too! Thad really liked this recipe. I actually think I would have liked it better without the balsamic/oil dressing or with just a little lime juice instead.

Tomato and Watermelon Salad
serves 2

Ingredients:

• 2 medium tomatoes chopped into 3/4 inch cubes
• 1/2 English cucumber, peeled and chopped into 3/4 inch cubes
• 1 cup watermelon, chopped into 3/4 inch cubes
• 2 small avocados, diced
• 1 TB mixed fresh herbs - I used basil and cilantro
• 1/4 tsp coriander
• 1 1/2 TB olive oil
• 1 1/2 TB balsamic vinegar
• salt and pepper to taste

Directions:

1. Combine tomatoes, cucumber, watermelon, avocado, herbs and coriander. Mix gently.
2. Whisk olive oil and balsamic vinegar together, add salt and pepper
3. Pour over salad, mix gently, serve!

Slightly adapted from this recipe on Epicurious

Fruit Fast - Day 2

Day 2 of the Fruit Fast and I'm still feeling pretty energized and not hungry.

7:30am Breakfast - smoothie with 1 cup frozen mango, 1 frozen banana, 6 fresh strawberries, water, 1 tsp coconut oil
11:00am Snack - 1 banana
12:30pm Lunch - Avocado Strawberry Fruit Salad mix of 1 avocado diced, 6 strawberries sliced, 3 cherry tomatoes diced, 8 red grapes, 1/2 red pepper diced, 1/2 orange pepper diced, 1 tsp lime juice, a little cayenne pepper and salt
2:00pm Snack - 2 clementines, handful red grapes
5:00pm Snack - smoothie with 1 frozen banana, handful of red grapes, 1 small green apple
8:45pm Dinner - raw zucchini noodles with avocado pesto - 1 zucchini, 1 avocado, garlic, olive oil, salt, basil
9:30pm Snack - frozen banana soft serve - 1 frozen banana, 1 cup frozen mango, 1/2 cup unsweetened coconut milk, topped with unsweetened coconut shreds and a TB of goji berries

I really enjoyed my lunch! Here's the recipe, I adapted it from another I'd seen for Avocado Strawberry Salad stuffed in a red pepper.

Avocado Strawberry Fruit Salad
1 serving

Ingredients:

• 1 avocado diced
• 1/2 red pepper, diced
• 1/2 orange pepper, diced
• 6 strawberries, sliced
• 3 cherry tomatoes, diced
• 8 red grapes
• 1 tsp lime juice
• dash cayenne pepper and salt to taste

Directions:

1. chop everything up, combine well and enjoy!

Dinner was delicious!! I suppose we stretched the fruit fast a bit to include some garlic and basil though. It was worth it. Still feeling light! This pesto was adapted from a recipe from ohsheglows.com

Raw Zucchini Pasta with Avocado Pesto
1 serving

Ingredients:

• 1 medium zucchini spiral sliced (you could use a vegetable peeler and make thin flat noodles if you dont have a spiral slicer.
• 1 medium sized ripe Avocado, pitted
• 1 TB lemon juice
• 3 cloves garlic
• 1/2 tsp sea salt
• 1/4 cup fresh basil
• 2 TB extra virgin olive oil
• 4 cherry tomatoes

Directions:

1. Place the garlic cloves, lemon juice and olive oil in food processor, process til smooth. 
2. Add in the avocado, basil and salt, process til smooth and creamy. Add in water if too thick.
3. Pour sauce onto noodles, garnish with chopped cherry tomatoes.

40 Days Fruit Fast, Day 1

I know what you're thinking. She's gone off the deep end! No worries,I'm not doing a fruit fast for 40 Days! 40 Days to a Personal Revolution is the name of the program we are doing at Divine Yoga this Spring. Our studio is a Baptiste studio and the basis for this program is the book by Baron Baptiste, 40 Days to Personal Revolution: A Breakthrough Program to Radically Change Your Body and Awaken the Sacred Within Your Soul. Its focus is on a deep personal awareness through daily yoga practice, meditation, and diet, plus reading and excavation questions along with a weekly meeting. Some days have been more challenging than others to fit everything in. Definitely not doing so well with the meditation practice but have an awareness and intention to improve over the next few weeks.

We're about halfway through the 40 days and this week calls for a 3 day fruit fast/cleanse. I started mine today. We are to eat as close to fresh fruits and nothing else. Thad and I decided to make a few exceptions for ourselves with adding in herbs and small amount of spice. I also decided that it was important to listen to my body and added in the protein powder and creatine with my after run smoothie because of how I felt. Luckily a lot of things you might consider vegetables are actually fruit - eggplant, zucchini, tomatoes, peppers, cucumber. I love fruit in any case, so hoping that this won't be too difficult for me. They suggest eating fruit frequently throughout the day to not become hungry and avoid spikes in blood sugar, and that's worked out well today for me.

Today's Food Diary

7:30am Pre-Run - 1 banana, 5 dried cherries
9:30am Post-Run - 1 banana
10:00am Breakfast - smoothie made with 1 frozen banana, 1 cup frozen mango, 1 cara cara orange, 1/2 TB coconut oil, 1 cup water (plus I added a scoop of protein powder and creatine for muscle recovery/building)
12:00pm Samples at Costco - 1 orange slice, 1 grapefruit slice, 1 cube watermelon
1:30pm Lunch - 1 avocado, 1 tomato, 1 red pepper, 1/3 english cucumber, 1 TB chopped cilantro, 1 dash cayenne pepper, 1 dash salt, 1 tsp lime juice. (diced everything and combined)
3:30pm Snack - 1/3 frozen banana, 4 strawberries, handful of raspberries with some water blended into a smoothie.
4:30pm Snack - 2 clementines
6:30pm Dinner - grilled eggplant, zucchini, cherry tomatoes and yellow bell peppers with sliced fresh tomato and a little basil, 1 clementine
8:00pm Snack (planned) - strawberries, blackberries, blueberries, raspberries with some unsweetened coconut flakes

I also wanted to share the recipe used for dinner, in case any fellow 40 Days participants are looking for creative ideas for meals.

Eggplant Zucchini Tomato Sandwiches
serves 2

Ingredients:

• 1 medium eggplant
• 1 medium zucchini
• 10 cherry tomatoes (I used some organic heirloom ones from Trader Joe's that were so pretty and yummy)
• 1 yellow bell pepper
• 1 fresh tomato, sliced thin (I used an organic tomato on the vine, also from Trader Joe's)
• 4 leaves fresh basil
• Herbamare Organic Herb Seasoning Salt,
• olive oil spray  
• fine sea salt

Directions:

1. Slice eggplant into 1/2 inch slices. Lay out flat on a piece of waxed paper. Sprinkle salt liberally on each piece. Let sit for 30 minutes. Then with a paper towel, wipe off all the salt and the liquid that has come up, what this does is helps take the bitterness out of the eggplant.
2. Slice zucchini into 1/2 inch slices on the diagonal.
3. Thread cherry tomatoes onto a skewer
4. Core and cut yellow bell pepper into 3 sections.
5. Spray all veggies with olive oil spray lightly on both sides. Sprinkle lightly with Herbamare.
6. On pre-heated grill, grill all veggies on both sides. You could also use a grill pan on the stovetop or roast on a baking sheet in the oven as well.
7. Slice fresh tomato into thin 'sandwich' slices.
8. Tear fresh basil into small pieces.
9. Make your own veggie sandwiches! I layered eggplant and fresh tomato with a bit of basil for one that you see here. I also make one with the yellow pepper, zucchini and more eggplant, with the roasted cherry tomatoes smashed in between. Delicious!

Another New Beginning

I suppose life is actually full of many new beginnings! Another one began for me today. Today was my first day as a full time Marketing Coordinator at a tech company in the auto industry.

It's been 2 years since we closed LM. Almost 10 years since I was last employed full time by someone else. I know that even in the past year I've written on this very blog that I didn't know I'd ever want to go back to full time work, that I didn't know how I felt about ever going back to the corporate world. Our perspectives change as life goes on, our experiences change us. What prompted this change for me now? Besides simply needing some time and distance from the stress that took over my life with my business, and being burnt out and depressed - at the root of it truly is my yoga practice.  I've talked about yoga being so much more than the physical practice, and this new step in my life is a great example of the personal transformations that can take place. I learn on my mat about staying present, about being open to possibilities, about pushing my edge, and being compassionate to myself, about celebrating accomplishments and not comparing myself to others, about finding joy! These things apply off my mat, in my life, and gave me the confidence to realize that I was ready to go back to a full time career-related position, and that it was okay to not push myself into needing a high level position, instead looking for balance in my life, yet still finding challenge and interest -- and that those decisions will make me an all around happier person.

Bala vinyasa yoga Naples

Thad and I got to go to Bala Vinyasa in Naples this morning for a 90 minute class with Kiersten Mooney. We received a friendly warm welcome from everyone there and chatted with Kiersten and Debi (who Thad knew from his Level 1 bootcamp). One of the women at the desk told me she grew up in Farmington Hills and the woman on the mat next to me was originally from Rochester, MI!

Then we proceeded to get our butts kicked in a really great and sweaty practice! The studio was a little warm but with about 50 people mat to mat, in no time at all my mat was slippery and sweat was pouring. Lesson to not walk in a studio again without my big yogitoes towel! I had a little one and a regular hand towel so did my best to make do, but still my feet slid out from under me in my first wheel :( I did end up getting a great assist from kiersten in my last wheel though - felt amazing since I was so warmed up. How I love backbends! I also got to see something new to try - camel to wheel. Going back with arms bent and shoulders back, up on the balls of your feet, then dropping back to wheel- so cool! If it weren't for my slippery mat I would have taken her up on the offer to try it with an assist.

Kiersten was an excellent teacher and many of the things she spoke to reinforced what I took away from Baron in Toronto -- closing shoulders in to then open up, reminders about feet being on, to name a couple. Her style is fun and with an athletic focus - lots of extra push ups and reverse chaturunga, low and high boat. We also had a 10 minute hold in frog that the room groaned about, but I loved! I was seriously only an inch or two away from the floor by the end of it. She also spoke to common Baptiste themes such as when your mind takes you out of a pose (during frog). Other than my distraction of worrying about slipping, it was a fantastic challenging class and friendly community - so glad we were able to go!

Fractured!

Could timing be much worse? This is my first broken bone of any kind. Apparently that loud crack I heard when I fell out of headstand Sunday morning in class was a small fracture near my right index finger knuckle. Had xrays for the first time too (well other than dental). 4 weeks with this splint. Thankfully the Dr told me that I could do yoga as long as I have the splint on to prevent the finger from going backward. It's a little swollen but I'm not in any pain.

I went to yoga tonight and was thankful that Cheryl pushed me to not use this as an excuse to either back off or be afraid. I even did one wheel and did a tripod headstand (at the wall) for the first time. Keeping the right pressure in my hands in downward dog and not going into my wrists seems to be the most awkward. 

I've spent the evening reading up on nutrition to help heal broken bones. Leafy greens, broccoli, fish, yogurt, nuts. All on the menu. Thankfully that's how Ive been eating!

I'm a little bummed still because I wanted to be at my top shape in 10 days to get the most out of the weekend, but am trying to make the best of it and look for other ways I can learn about my practice and focus on other aspects of it. 

Laws of Transformation

In less than two weeks I'll be in Toronto for the Baptiste Foundations in Action weekend yoga immersion. Yoga is about so much more than the physical practice. In preparation, I decided to read through a couple of Baron's books to refresh and energize me. I'm currently reading "40 Days to Personal Revolution". I'm hoping someday our studio offers this program to go through as a group, or perhaps I'll consider doing the digital version in the future (one of my teachers is currently doing this so I look forward to hearing what she thought when it's done). One of the key teachings in this book is the Laws of Transformation. These can guide us in growth to living a truthful and healthy life. Here's my notes on the laws:

#1 Seek the Truth - have the courage to face the pure truth of ourselves so we can move on and grow in more honest and authentic ways. You must accept yourself as you are, then you can change - self-acceptance.

#2 Be Willing to Come Apart - we need to get to the point where we are finally willing to give up control so that we can experience the healing we need. When we control the things we are not meant to control, we are interfering with our natural success and potential. The way of the universe is for all things to move in the direction of healing, that is, wholeness. The body wants to heal itself, our emotional body is seeking balance, our spirit wants redemption; however, we need to get ourselves out of the way in order for our natural health to shine through. When we surrender, we receive. It is only when we re willing to give up the fragile hold we have on our illusions and come apart that we can begin to see the truth, surrender, and begin anew.

#3 Step out of Your Comfort Zone - Life is never static - we are either awakening and growing or numbing out and spiraling downward. Stepping out of our comfort zone means dropping the patterns and stories of the past. If we don't step out of the known - the comfort zone - we bring yesterday's limited thinking into the present, dooming the present to be just like the past. When you keep repeating the same things, you get the same results. Many of us would rather cling to the familiar than risk the unknown. Face fears head on to dissolve their hold over us. Let the past die. We are afraid to let go, to face the groundlessness and uncertainty. Take the journey inward - the way out is in. Once we've gone inward we can step out beyond our comfort zone and find the courage to flow from our hearts. You must face your fears, abide in unconditional openness and cut through your tendencies to hold on. Let go of everything and hold onto nothing so that virtue can shine through.

#4 Commit to Growth - Either commit to a change of heart and mind and live it out, or you are just playing around. Growth requires a singleness of mind - a total commitment to the path of growth - no wavering, no detours, absolute commitment to staying present, unconditional commitment to discovering and living by the truth within. We are the only ones who know and hear our internal dialogues, and we are the only ones who can make the choice to stay and unfold. Call your conflicts and troubles lessons and remember that every experience developes some latent force within you - you will grow vigorous and happy, however adverse your circumstances may be.

#5 Shift Your Vision - the third eye is the source of our spiritual vision. If we have had an opening and cleansing of the heart, the right energy can be released and spark life in this spiritual eye. If we pay attention to living according to our higher mind and our morals, it is said that this eye comes to life, we begin to see ourselves and the world through new eyes. Whatever spiritual or physical tranformation process we are going through, we are seeking to undo and unlearn a thought system that has blinded our true vision. To shift our vision means looking at the usual things with fresh eyes. As we start to spiritually awaken, our new vision allows us to see that most of our obstacles are created within our own hearts. A vision shift calls for attention, intention and faith. Whatever you give your positive or negative attention to, you will energize. Whatever you focus on, you fortify. Intention - when you hold an awareness of what you need to do in the back of your mind, you direct your energy (and the universe) in that direction. Right intent from your pure heart. There is a certain leap of faith we need to take. The real phenomenon is in our concsciousness, in the power of what's possible.

#6 Drop What You Know - just be the change. More education is not always the solution. What is needed is a special kind of awakening that brings you to understand things for yourself. Dropping your brain means to rediscover, trust, and grow from this blessed state - which the ancient ones called living by faith. At a certain point we all need to make the shift from living from our head into trusting what's in our heart. We need to become intuitve beings. Oversensitivity to other people's words has an insidious way of eroding our faith in our own perceptions. Find out what the inner teacher has to say. Cast out our self-doubt. When we really let go, suddenly we open up and there is space for new energy and insight. There is such wisdom and healing power in not knowing. We don't change by thinking, we change by being and doing with a pure intent. Be fully present and open.

#7 Relax with What Is - When we relax in the face of stress, a power greater than ourselves can act through us. Put our thoughts, our effort, our resistance, ur reaction aside and trust in an intelligence that is smarter than we are. The moment you stop forcing a result, you develop a mental and muscular poise under pressure.

#8 Remove the Rocks - Unlearn pride, anger, fear, conditioning, resistance and come back to our natural way of being. Transformation comes not by adding things on but by removing what didn't belong in the first place. There is something perfect already within us. We think that we have struggles and problems in life, but the only problem we have is a disconnection from our center. When we come back to self, all the other things begin to take care of themselves, and our lives begin to flow. The greatest power we have over ourselves is our ability to change our minds about ourselves.There is tremendous power in just knowing what is going on within us, not so that we can work on our stuff but so that we can begin to release it. We become very adept at knowing all about our problems, but the key is not to stop there, it is to see beyond pathology into an enlightened vision. If we can soften our heart, give up some of our old ways of being, and reconnect to the truth, our problems will give us up.

#9 Don't Rush the Process - Real growth doesn't come from pushing through or breaking out of anything. It comes from a gentle melting in. through the practice of patience we increase the gap between stimulus and response. We learn to be okay with our restlessness and our sense of guilt about not doing enough, and then we can hopefully begin to let these things go.If we are so wound up in getting somewhere, we don't realize that every step of the way we missed where we were. The very struggle of the process is what makes you sharp and gives you valuable experience and maturity. The greatest benefits come from the small shifts that move us into new directions. Our greatest source of wisdom is what is happening to us right now, where we are. Commitment to patience.

#10 Be True to Yourself - Look within to discover what you know in your heart to be right and then act on it. Live by our conscience, our own intuitive light. Have to be willing to go against the status quo, whether others approve or not. When you say or do something that is completely true to you, you access your gretest power and move closer to authentic whole-life health. You need to constantly be on the alert to keep things clean. In this way of being, you are being true to yourself, and to others.

#11 Be Still and Know - meditation brings you into the present moment=perfect teacher. You will be less reactive and more calm in challenging moments. You will be more anchored to your conscience which allows you to make good decisions with less confusion. The truth will follow us and poke at us until we acknowledge it. We have become masters at drowning out that truth, that small quiet voice within.This inner knowing whispers the way to live our brightest light if we would only stop and stay still enough to listen, and then humble ourselves enough to follow.  Eventually our aim is to have our inner stillness reflect outward into all the comings and goings of our lives.

#12 Understand That the Whole Is the Goal - We don't transform in parts. Every aspect of ourselves and our lives is interconnected with every other one. Health is wholeness. The goal is to make peace with all the tendrils and conflicts of your life, both inside and out, weaving the strands together into your own spiritual coat of many colors. In the end, if you dedicate your energies to detaching from struggle, giving up fear, taking right action, practicing true patience within yourelf, you will find that all the pieces of your life begin to radiate with the luminosity of whole and true health.

Headstand

I remember the first time I was able to get up into headstand. In months leading up to it I recall commenting that it was too much pressure on my head, or that my arms weren't strong enough to hold my body up. With practice, and increased strength (and perhaps a few more pounds lost), I did it. And I was so excited. Now when inversions came along and everyone pulled their mat to the wall, I could go up into headstand too. I love the feeling of being balanced, it really does feel weightless, and it is invigorating. So, for months, mat pulled to wall, 10 seconds later, I'm in headstand - but I needed the wall behind me to kick up to. I didn't need it for support, once I was up, I was up and balanced away from the wall. So, my current nemesis is getting up to headstand in a controlled way so that I can do it without the wall. I am having such a tough time with this. Is it because for so long I have been kicking up? Is it not enough core strength? Is it not pressing my elbows down enough? Is it not bring my shoulders back enough? or maybe a combination. But I am determined to get this! My goal has been to be able to do this before going to Toronto in a couple weeks, but I'm not sure it's doable. I'm going to try though! Yesterday I worked on it a little in Deb's class in the morning, then after coming home very frustrated and being so hard on myself, Thad insisted on working on it with me in the afternoon in our basement yoga room. Since he's 'discovered' uddiyana bandha this week, he's convinced it's the answer to everything. I do see that sucking in my abdomen gets my legs closer and my back straighter and reminds me to use my core, but I don't think it's the whole answer to my problem. Anyway, I did do a little better with it, more controlled. Then last night we went to Yoga Center for Healthy Living in Brighton as part of Thad's teacher training (he is observing classes at 5 other studios). Lee Ann is a wonderful teacher, very nurturing and very knowledgeable. This was an Ashtanga class, something neither of us had done before. At one point there was opportunity for headstand, in the middle of the room, not against the wall. So, I gave it another try with Thad spotting me, but my arms were just too worn out from all the yoga throughout the day. I'm going to commit to working on it every day though, hoping to get it soon!

So much to learn!

Yoga has opened a whole new world for me, and there is so much to learn and explore. From the physical practice to taking it into my life on a daily basis, it's a constant practice. Today I went to Rasa Yoga in Novi for a class. Not because I'm not happy with my studio - I love Divine and all the teachers - but because I wanted to learn about other styles of yoga. Plus I had a Groupon to use! Rasa is an Anusara studio, which I found to be more spiritually influenced and focused on alignment than Baptiste yoga. My teacher was Marianne, a very friendly and knowledgeable older woman who clearly speaks from her heart. Class was just two of us, so she gave a lot of instruction for me about Anusara's themes and talked a lot about anatomy and alignment. She did hands on adjusting and had each of us watch one another do trikonasana (triangle) and see how she adjusted us to open our shoulder and heart, more of a lifting up and back like in a back bend, rather than just opening back by reaching your arm back and having your upper body follow. I already love this pose, but today it was truly awesome! felt amazing! I learned a lot about putting my thigh bones back into my hips and how it gave me more room in bending forward, more stability in poses. So much to think about. A friend told me Anusara would be a nice complement to Baptiste, that I could take what I learn and apply it to my practice and she was, of course, absolutely right. I have a couple more weeks left on my Groupon so hope to get in there a few more times.

Basement yoga

We didn't want to be gone too long since it was Thad's mom's last night with us before heading back to CA. So, basement yoga it was tonight! Thad had practiced earlier today so this gave him some practice teaching experience too. I have a hard time not interrupting and giving him feedback and acting like a student. He says it was helpful but I don't want to be discouraging in any way! I'm excited for him!

I did have him help me with practicing kicking to handstand. Feels a long way off by I know that's why I need to keep at it - it will happen!

Amazing Weekend!

Thad and I with Clara, who Thad met at Level 1 training last month

We got home yesterday from an amazing weekend spent in Chicago. Although really it's not the location that made it amazing - while Chicago is a great city and we enjoyed spending time in such a vibrant place, it was amazing because of the people and community we shared it with at the Baptiste yoga immersion. I was nervous for weeks!! seriously, weeks! As in, debating in my mind (and okay, with Thad, too) if I should really be going, nervous! So much self doubt and worrying about whether I was good enough. Yes, Thad and my teachers told me that's not what it's about and I had nothing to be nervous about - but call me stubborn or perhaps just human - I needed to experience it for myself to really understand that. The day turned out to be absolutely awesome! Baron was so incredibly insightful and inspiring and I came away from the event with so much to think about and feeling so great - and feeling that energy from the inside out! I am also thankful to have been able to share the day with Thad and about a dozen people from our yoga studio. I really enjoyed getting to know them on a deeper level and sharing with them.

The morning started with some discussion, then moved to about 4 1/2 hours of yoga practice. There were pauses in between as he stopped to demonstrate or talk about certain poses, so it was not as daunting as it sounds. I learned a great deal and only wish I was one of those people who has a photographic memory so I could rewind and see what I missed while I was thinking about one thing or another. For my practice, I came away with the concept of True North in every pose, and the awareness that it really is true that the last wheel can be your best - even after about 8 of them, that last one felt the most open! But so much of what Baron talks about is really personal development. Finding the blocks in our lives and what we can do to make transformations. I took away a real appreciation for the concept of living in the now, that the past is gone and the future hasn't happened yet. While I do think that is something I have moved towards over the past two years as our lives have gone through so much change, believing that at heart in everything you do is a step further. It was empowering to learn that so many others came there with feelings in their lives around not being good enough. It is something I have really struggled with and I think it holds me back in many ways. We talked about giving up those things that limit us - such as the concept of not being good enough. Making those statements to the world, putting it out there, helps to make you live it.

So, I went into the weekend nervous and not feeling good enough - and came away inspired, energized, lighter inside and wanting to spend a week with Baron at bootcamp sometime next year! Yoga is so much more than the physical practice and while I 'knew' that in my mind, I now truly 'believe' it too in my heart. I also know that I wouldn't be in that place now if it weren't for my supportive and loving husband and my supportive and inspiring teachers. I would love to give the gift of this feeling to everyone I know!

Possibilities

Just open yourself to the possibilities and you will be amazed at where you can go and what you can do. It sounds so cliché, but when you truly believe it in your heart is when the world opens to you. Yoga has brought me to this place and I can only dream where it will take me. I was contemplating this last night after my yoga class. I had one of those nights where everything felt ‘on’ – whether it was or not really didn’t matter as much as how it felt to me (and that is one of the things that makes yoga so awesome!).

A few weeks ago I was in Florida and practicing yoga at American Yoga in Deerfield Beach when at the end of a long tough class I tried for wheel – and got it! I seriously was almost in tears during savasana I was so happy. I always swore it was not enough upper body strength (and secretly thinking I still weighed too much and maybe in another 10 lbs I’ll be better able to lift myself, etc). Teachers told me it’s all in the legs. They said don’t think, just do it. I got tips on different ways to try to make it work. Legs closer in, arms wider, arms closer, try a strap, the list goes on. Well all it seemed to take was a bit of exhaustion and a ‘what the hell!’ attitude and I just went right up! And the next day I did it again. O. M. G.! Talk about feeling like I could take on the world!

So I returned to Michigan and for one reason or another didn’t have the opportunity to do wheel in class for at least a week. I knew to not set myself up to be disappointed if I didn’t get it again, and so earlier in the week when wheel didn’t happen and felt like a struggle, I gave myself a pep talk that it would happen again, I just had to be open to it and confident. Last night I went up into wheel not once, but twice! Interestingly, after class I was talking with my teacher about it and she commented that she saw me pause and really think about it before going up into wheel – what I realized later was that I was actually pausing to talk myself out of thinking too hard about it and to just give it a shot and try to be confident that my body now remembers the pose. I was so excited, I felt like I could conquer anything after that! Taking that feeling away from my mat I’ve had just a fantastic day today. Who knew a simple yoga pose could mean so much and deliver so much? What a freeing feeling it is.

Love What Is

I cannot lay claim to the title of this post - it's actually from the September 2011 issue of Yoga Journal. This is called a 'centering practice'. I thought it would be great to share with friends - you don't have to have ever done yoga to benefit from taking a few minutes to do this - take the time to appreciate the moment in which you live. Find a quiet space and follow this practice:

Love What Is

Take a very deep breath in and a very slow breath out.

Sit up very straight. Notice that as your spine lengthens, your heart opens.

Now breathe into the space o an open heart - feel into the space of an open heart.

A heart that is empty, a heart that holds the whole world.

Breathe into a heart that can hold the whole world.

Feel into a heart that can hold the whole world.

Breate into the sweetness of this moment.

Feel into the sweetness of this moment.

Allow yourself to be wholeheartedly alive and well in the life you have, now.

by Rolf Gates

Taking Yoga Off the Mat

Ever since I started practicing yoga I have heard this talked about – whether it’s during a class, in a magazine, a book or a blog I’m reading. I guess my initial reaction to the phrase was probably along the lines of ‘oh that sounds lovely’, but not really understanding how that would happen. After 5 months of regular practice, I get it, I really do.

Last week I was at Kensington for a morning walk with Izzie. I wasn’t in the best mood that morning, frustrated with the scale not moving last week even with all the healthy eating and extra walking I was getting in. So I was there for my walk with more of a ‘must do’ attitude than a ‘want to do’ one. Izzie obviously felt my attitude because she was doing everything possible to frustrate me and prevent me from getting my 3 mile walk in. Not listening when I told her ‘let’s go’ or ‘come on’, planting her feet down firmly while she sniffed plants, dragging me as she tried to run after a chipmunk or stop and stare at a turtle. Then I realized, Izzie wasn’t trying to frustrate me (of course not!), she was simply enjoying herself! Yoga teaches me not to fight things, to enjoy the present moment. In an instant I realized that Izzie was helping me take my yoga off the mat and into the world! I changed my attitude in a split second, acquiesced and let her lead me to the water’s edge where fish were jumping around in the water. I stopped worrying about my pace and getting my heart rate up and instead enjoyed the peacefulness of the morning at the lake and the joy and amusement at watching Izzie jump back after sniffing the water. How did I ever let negative thoughts overtake enjoying the present? What a great lesson to learn – and I can thank both my yoga practice and Izzie for it!

Yoga away from home

I was both nervous and excited about trying out yoga somewhere new. Thad and I go to Divine Yoga in South Lyon, a Baptiste Power Yoga studio, and it's home for us. But since I'm in Florida for almost 3 weeks and I practice yoga almost every day, I thought it worth researching somewhere to go while I'm here. There's not a Baptiste studio here though. So, I read reviews, looked at websites and with the encouragement of one of my teachers, decided on one with the attitude of it being a yoga adventure.

After sitting in the car for 2 days, I jumped at the chance to go to yoga. The studio I decided to try out is beautiful inside - large room with stone walls, partially mirrored walls, black ceiling, candlelight, and black rubber floors. Very peaceful. It's also hot yoga - 95 degrees. I thought what I did already was heated yoga, but let me tell you, there is a huge difference between 90 or so and 95! I can guarantee you that I have never sweated so much in my entire life as I have these past few days! The first class I took was taught by the owner, who also runs their yoga teacher training program and was voted South Florida's best yoga teacher in January. The type of class is a bit different than the Baptiste style that I normally do and there are some poses that are new to me, but I have enjoyed it as well. I never thought I'd say that I miss working on inversions every day, but I do. I've made a lot of progress in the past few weeks with working toward headstand and handstand, having just started being able to do tripod and working toward wheel, so I hope I am not set back by not having these included in my practice for a few weeks - or else I need to do them here at my brother's house. 

I have mixed feelings about the mirrors. It was helpful in someways to be able to correct my own alignment, but at the same time I found I was feeling more self conscious about my still non-flat belly and arms that while more muscular than ever, still have some flab and skin that needs time to shrink up. Well I can do anything for a couple weeks and it's not like I know these people or really care what they think. 

Today I went to two classes actually! The first one this morning was taught by a woman, Jessica. Awesome class, I felt the most 'at home' in her class than any of the other ones I've taken this week. She just has this great fluid but powerful style. She even sang and played music during savasana at the end of class. I know that sounds terribly touchy feely spiritual, but it really wasn't - it was just beautiful. I definitely will not miss her class next Friday! The 2nd class I took while Brandon and Avery took a kids yoga class - the teacher was just okay, not very creative though. 

One thing I am getting a lot from this style of yoga is a lot of hip opening poses which I know I need, no matter how uncomfortable it may be. I do find that the warmth in the room has helped with making these types of poses, like pigeon and double pigeon, a bit easier for me. 

Well tomorrow morning I'm trying the owner's class again, this time an Advanced class. I'm ready to give it a shot in any case and expect to lose 4 lbs of sweat in 1 1/2 hours! 

p.s. Brandon and Avery loved kids yoga!